Take a look at Song of Solomon chapter 4 in the Bible. It’s worth a quick read. The husband is praising the beauty of his wife and he is really over the top and quite explicit in his praise of her body. Then in verse 7, he sums in all up by saying she is “flawless or without spot or blemish”. She is perfect! Such is young love, but that is how he sees her. No woman is actually perfect but that is how love works.
Of course this is a very non-subtle metaphor for how God sees the church, his bride, in Christ. God looks at us in love and sees us perfect. Not because we are perfect (we are not) but God see us in Christ. This is same language in Ephesians chapter 5, where Paul tells husbands to love their wives as Christ loves the church. It tells husbands to present their wives to God without spot or blemish. How can this happen if we never start seeing them the way God does in Christ?
Now let’s talk man to man. How do you view your wife? Is she perfect in your eyes? If not, maybe you are not loving her with the eyes of faith or from the perspective of grace. This really is a choice. Love looks past the faults and flaws and sees the perfection. According to research, men who feel that they have “married up” have better marriages than those who do not. Zig Zigler, the wildly successful motivational speaker always said that he had a great marriage simply because he counted himself so lucky to be married to his wife. He placed her high above himself. Let me ask you this, “What harm will actually result if you started seeing your wife as generally perfect”? Maybe she will feel really loved…if you started acting like she was perfect. Start with the concept that she is the standard of beauty, that she is correct and wise, heck, start thinking she is perfect. You won’t be any worse than Solomon in love.